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Like Buses, Only In The No Parking Zone


Dorset

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None in sight for ages, then a whole host of them threaten to flood our midfield with enough talent to satiate the longest of creativity-craving thirsts. I’m talking playmaker/specialist No.10/trequartista here and invading territory once proudly held at the Euros, both on and off the pitch, by Pirlo and Pauly respectively… that is until those Italian stallions were duly trampled on by higher quality horsepower galloping over them in a one-side final showdown.

Okay, International football may well be a far cry from any club level comparison, but it’s a damning truth to say that this type of player has been conspicuous by absence for years from our club and this country, so it really is a blessing that Roman is addressing the problem for the Chels by employing what can only be described as overkill tactics. Just to emphasise the point, or rub it in, the silky-skilled Oscar has now become the latest in an ever-growing number of players destined to occupy that small plot of prime SW6 land just behind Torres and our cup suddenly runneth over in an area of the park that had previously been looking decidedly parched.

London buses may be my first analogy, but parking them certainly isn’t, because nobody can possibly accuse us of planning a repeat latter-stage Champions League performance with the likes of Mata, Oscar and Hazard all lined up and ready to spring on the opposition at a moment’s notice. Nor can there be any complaints when Marin plus, in all probability, Moses add presence and width to those rushes at an unsuspecting opposition, with Piazon pitched into the mix occasionally for cameo flavouring and invaluable experience.

Yet Chelsea fans, being what we are, will still have them [complaints that is] and they need to be put these into context sooner rather than later. For a start, anyone of the opinion that Josh McEachran suffers as a direct result of this anticipated Media-hyped-as-expensive ‘cause celebre’ midfield should realise that Oscar’s arrival does not affect him, competing as he will for the deeper, distributive role in a 4-2-3-1along with Frank and, should Moses eventually reach a right wing Promised Land, that cover-all-bases player affectionately known as Rammy. This, then, leaves Mikel, Romeu (Essien?) to do battle for the ball-winning role, providing enough scope for all concerned to render the breaking news that Meireles might be on his bike to pastures new as almost an irrelevance in terms of impact on the midfield as a whole. Indeed, the fact that Raul could be peddling all the way to Napoli allows us to dream of Edinson Cavani being part of a potential swap deal, plus bundles of cash of course, and it also serves to highlight the problems our rivals are experiencing.

For example, let’s consider United’s abortive attempt to lure Lucas Moura into their fold, due to PSG making what [if the Mancs had done it] a pretty impressive and rather massive statement of intent. The exorbitant price and corresponding salary for the 19yr-old, instantly described by Ferguson as a case of ’the game going mad’, was then followed by Sky headlines proclaiming a Red Devils lead in the race to sign Robin van Persie - a panacea for their midfield problems if ever you saw one! And, incidentally, how has this ‘lead’ been attained? Well, the Guardian believe that Van the Man is about to be offered terms that will see him match Wayne for weekly wage, a sum acquired and inflated by the Scouser through threats to move next door to the noisy neighbours. Priceless irony, or what?!

Nor will it be too long before Wenger weighs in with his two-penneth, probably just after he’s addressed his own defensive difficulties by forking out the sale proceeds on another offensive Southampton youngster, without realising the priceless irony in that too. Still, I suppose both managerial icons can then turn their attention to a two-pronged attack on the ineffectiveness of Financial Fair Play, much like Sydney Chelsea has done on another thread, but with nowhere near his degree of insight. If I might be plagiaristic at this point, it seems that FFP accounting allows clubs to amortise transfers by spreading the cost of the player - transfer fee and wages - over the life of the contract, so that it becomes a yearly expense rather than a one-off hit, thereby assisting the spending of those that can, albeit very much to the annoyance of those that can’t.

As Sydney also explained, ‘because losses are still acceptable (to some degree) for the next three seasons, it seems the secret to beating FFP is to spend big on young players with a) resale value and b) long-term contracts, and also not to spend heavily in consecutive seasons.’ Does this approach remind you of any club in particular at the moment? Could it also be the reason why United went for Moura in the first place and why he cost more than the Glazers would conscience? Maybe, but that doesn’t explain the headlong rush to buy a 29yr-old on the rebound, nor will it do your resale figures a lot of good either.

Still, I suppose there will always be those who bury their heads in the sand and the past, being only too quick to blame the big spenders for pricing everybody else out of the marketplace. Surely the moment has come to move on and for us all to get about our separate lives supporting our own clubs, as Roman, the Glazers and Stan Kroenke know them to be. Blow me, is that really the time? The present? The here and now? Anyone tell me when the next bus is due down the Kings Road?

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