I’m currently writing a football book based on parodies of different fans.  Each fan falling within a different stereotype.

 

So far I’ve written one for an old skool hooligan (from the casual era), one for a small club Northern fan (he supports his team through thick and thin, hates the South and will live in his small town for the rest of his life....it is more a p*ss take of his small mind, small town mentality than the North) and one of those old men who forever go on about how the game was better in their day.  "The ball was like a cannon ball back then....now its a balloon played by poofs wearing ballet shoes!" etc. etc.

 

Can you think of any more types for me to parody?  I was thinking of maybe a new breed ‘fan’.  The sort who claims to support Liverpool, Barcelona, Juventus, Shaktar and Brazil (oh, and the Miami Dolphins)…..all from the comfort of their bedroom in Northampton.  Buying all the merchandise and watching the games on internet streams. Then they seem genuinely surprised when someone questions their ‘support’.

 

I want it to be light hearted and irreverent so characters easy to lampoon would be great.  Obviously someone like a statto geek is easy to take the p*ss out of but it is difficult to make an account of their life seem funny.

 

Thaaaaaanks

 

I’m currently writing a football book based on parodies of different fans.  Each fan falling within a different stereotype.

 

So far I’ve written one for an old skool hooligan (from the casual era), one for a small club Northern fan (he supports his team through thick and thin, hates the South and will live in his small town for the rest of his life....it is more a p*ss take of his small mind, small town mentality than the North) and one of those old men who forever go on about how the game was better in their day.  "The ball was like a cannon ball back then....now its a balloon played by poofs wearing ballet shoes!" etc. etc.

 

Can you think of any more types for me to parody?  I was thinking of maybe a new breed ‘fan’.  The sort who claims to support Liverpool, Barcelona, Juventus, Shaktar and Brazil (oh, and the Miami Dolphins)…..all from the comfort of their bedroom in Northampton.  Buying all the merchandise and watching the games on internet streams. Then they seem genuinely surprised when someone questions their ‘support’.

 

I want it to be light hearted and irreverent so characters easy to lampoon would be great.  Obviously someone like a statto geek is easy to take the p*ss out of but it is difficult to make an account of their life seem funny.

 

Thaaaaaanks

I feel pretty much targeted by these two sentences. Not everyone here had the luck to be born in London or somewhere nearby and not everyone here has enough money to travel to go and watch games.

I feel pretty much targeted by these two sentences. Not everyone here had the luck to be born in London or somewhere nearby and not everyone here has enough money to travel to go and watch games.

Hmmm....yes, but I don't see why such a person as the one I described shouldn't be open to parody.  Comedy sketch shows are full of different stereotypes and we all fall into some of them every now and then.  It's whether or not you can take a joke.  I don't want it to be too scathing either.....just gently mocking.  I don't see anything wrong with that.  In this instance I'm also talking more about someone who supports a million teams.....very much a modern day phenomenon.

Hmmm....yes, but I don't see why such a person as the one I described shouldn't be open to parody.  Comedy sketch shows are full of different stereotypes and we all fall into some of them every now and then.  It's whether or not you can take a joke.  I don't want it to be too scathing either.....just gently mocking.  I don't see anything wrong with that.  In this instance I'm also talking more about someone who supports a million teams.....very much a modern day phenomenon.

I don't really care about jokes, the point is you are questioning the passions of some fans in here. That wasn't a joke as far as my english goes.

I don't really care about jokes, the point is you are questioning the passions of some fans in here. That wasn't a joke as far as my english goes.

Well I want it to be a comedy football book so if you're not interested in jokes then it won't really be for you anyway.

How about a parody of the fans of yesteryear, when stadiums were full of men wearing flat caps waving rattles, every one of them puffing on a Woodbine. No women to be seen, and young boys were transported to the front of the terraces over the heads of the crowd. The players celebrated goals with a brief handshake, and when the game was over they'd get the bus home along with the fans.

 

Why are you concentrating on the 'casual' hooligans? I much preferred the 70's, better styles, better music, better rucks, and the taking of ends was at its very height.

How about a parody of the fans of yesteryear, when stadiums were full of men wearing flat caps waving rattles, every one of them puffing on a Woodbine. No women to be seen, and young boys were transported to the front of the terraces over the heads of the crowd. The players celebrated goals with a brief handshake, and when the game was over they'd get the bus home along with the fans.

 

Why are you concentrating on the 'casual' hooligans? I much preferred the 70's, better styles, better music, better rucks, and the taking of ends was at its very height.

That one is pretty much covered with the 'old boy' thanks Bluebeard.  I'm making him very anti-modern football.

 

Erm....I guess cause I know a bit more about it.  I watched a few of those Nick Love films recently - 'The Firm' being one and dwelled on that (I know they're well exaggerated).  It was also originally supposed to be a Cass Pennant parody but then I reckon that might be seen as libel if I ever tried to get it published and Cass would wanna 'sort me aaaht' which wouldn't be nice.  Cass was very much at the peak of his powers during that casual scene.

Edited December 21, 201213 yr by BernardLambourde

A glory hunting scouser who cannot accept his side have never won a title since he's supported them

 

 

a chinese bloke with a camera

 

A cattle farmer from the Ivory coast who swears blind he is the clubs biggest fan, he never goes to games, has never left his own country, but watches games on a black and white portable TV, has a 1987 replica away shirt and has named his herd after every member of the squad.

Edited December 21, 201213 yr by BLUENUT

A glory hunting scouser who cannot accept his side have never won a title since he's supported them

I was thinking of something like that.  A Scouser parody would be a piece of p*ss. 

 

"We've got the best humour!"

"Erm....Ken Dodd and Stan Boardman?"

"We've got the best music?"

"Erm....by that you mean one good band that were formed 50 odd years ago?"

"We've got the best style!"

"Erm....shellsuits and perms!"

"We've got the biggest football team!"

"Erm....no championship since 1989/90?"

"We've got the BEST FANS IN THE WORLD!"

"Tell that to Juventus."

Edited December 21, 201213 yr by BernardLambourde

You got a northener - how about a coastal supporter, in a declining sea-side resort who sing about their pier and how they only win when the tides out

Ha ha...which team would that be?  Bournemouth?

Take you pick - its a parody innit?

 

 

Do you want me to write it for you?

Ha ha...yeah, I wouldn't mind.  As long as you're willing to waiver all royalty payments.