The Great Gooner Gullibility Mystery

[Dorset]

February in the UK is usually an inclement month, but it is even more so now that our opponents in the Carling Cup are confirmed. Time to hunker down and avoid all that slush the Media loves to revel in - and I?m not talking about the weather. No, it?s the almost mandatory support given to the Gunners at this time of year, in whatever competition they are still involved in, that is so irksome to us and probably every other non-gooner Londoner who cannot fathom the bias shown towards Wenger and any chosen eleven he cares to send out.

This time last year Media weight had to be thrown behind their CL challenge, to the diffident exclusion of our impending back to back titles success. This was due in no small part to a downturn in the young Gunners transition market and a growing need for all hacks to find a glimmer of hope for the Le Arse before someone turned the lights out at Highbury for the last time. This season is different only in so far as their sympathy vote should have disappeared and this post highlights my own incredulity over the Media?s enthralment with all things Emirates, which is so lasting that it survives, amongst other things, even their haughty dismissal of English talent and technique. Sadly, coverage of last night?s game answered few questions and it looks like we are destined for more of the same for some time yet.

Arsenal?s success in the Carling Cup is seen by the many besotted pundits as a triumph for Wenger?s policy of giving youth it?s head, whereas the more observant in our midst realise that the competition is effectively being treated with limited respect and the kudos of winning with ?the kids? is attained risk free, with any defeat bound to be put down to experience and quickly forgotten about.

Spurs had to suffer what I?d call this enforced favouritism in the first leg and, after throwing away a two goal lead, promptly got more of the same, accompanied by chants of ?2-0 and you ****** it up?. In reality, Martin Jol rock-a-byed these babies for an hour until Wenger, fearing a cradle snatch, brought on Rosicky and Clichy for Walcott and Traore, turning the game in the process. Arsene?s approach reminds me of a 50?s parent who sends his precious youngster out to play with his ball and marvels at the way he runs rings around his little playmates. That is until some big bruiser from Bolton pins him to a lamppost with a tackle, whereupon he calls his kiddy in and threatens police involvement. Being innocuous for an hour is the modern day equivalent (the exact equivalent will happen in the FA Cup next week) and you have to say that the withdrawal strategy works because nobody in the Media notices, or wants to report on, the failure of Arsenal youth.

Sir Richard Attenborough should get his brother David to do a documentary on the miracle that is the Arsenal player, as he pops out of puberty, plays a blinder and pops back in again. Transition is his cocoon and Arsene Wenger his creator and the Media perpetuate the phenomenon every season. Of course, relatively few end up as butterflies in our game and the last one wearing an Arsenal shirt belonged to a bygone age - I believe Perryeus Groveus was the species in question - but who really cares anyway?

Well, to be honest (?) the Media should, as bastions of all virtuous thinking in the game. Indeed, they should be asking how Arsenal in one year can sweet talk a local council over a new stadium that would ?allow them to develop English footballers? (so rubber stamp the planning permission please) and then subsequently stuff their teams full of foreigners, citing a dearth of talent and technique in home grown players as the reason for the change of mind.

Wenger, never slow to play the racist card himself, must be amazed at the free ride he gets at every press conference and marvel at what a little Gallic buttering up can achieve. A wry smile here, a shrug of the shoulders there and even the odd public rant is forgiven and forgotten tout suite. The League Cup final will be treated no differently - ?Arsene, can you tell us, will you be playing the youngsters in Cardiff, will you, will you?? A moments pause, a quizzical tilt of the head, ?Well?yes, I can see no reason not to, can you?? Wry smile turns to sly smile, laughter fills the room and Le Professor thinks to himself - how much longer can I keep these morons dancing to my tune? Answers on a postcard please, because, as Toyah Wilcox once said, it?s a mystery.

[bjd]

Dorset mate, dont let them and their adulation of Mr Spock get to you. The only thing worse than a Gooner loving hack is an actually Gooner itself. You know the type, a a Guardian reader, sandals, a know it all and more than likely the type of bloke who asks you to sit down.

It will make it so much sweeter, when , and excuse my french, we shove it up the c**ts at Cardiff.

[glory55]

Somebody buy Dorset a drink........the man's a genius!!

Mate you should be writing to the cfcuk fanzine with that!!

You Word-smith!!!

Class

[Dorset]

Thought I?d wait until after yesterday?s games before acknowledging your response, glory55, as I felt sure there would be plenty of evidence to back up my claims - and so it proved. The Young Gunners duly slipped out of title contention altogether (if indeed they were still in it) and the silence was deafening. Typical of the coverage they receive was Joe Lovejoy?s match report and the following paragraph in particular?

?For Arsenal there were mitigating circumstances. They have had a tough schedule of late for a young and comparatively small squad and it is to their credit that they continue to make good progress in the absence of half a team.?

Back in the transition box then - only to re-emerge later this month with full British Press backing for the underdogs. Didn?t they celebrate Groundhog Day last week?

[Oblivion]

?For Arsenal there were mitigating circumstances. They have had a tough schedule of late for a young and comparatively small squad and it is to their credit that they continue to make good progress in the absence of half a team.?

Biggest loada rubbish I've read in a while (or at least since yesterday). Those twits have at least 2 players who can play in every position (not to mention 8 left-backs and 3 right-backs)!!! What small squad?

[c3blu]

Its Wengers choice to have a young squad, so sorry if i'm not falling over myself to praise him for the great job he is doing for English( i mean French football).

The media seem to forget this and instead seem to be hell bent on telling the world how le'Arse play the beautiful game. They do play good football so i can deal with that, but what has annoyed me recently is the way Wenger and his players now seem to be questioning the tactics of other teams.(what its got to do with them?)

Are teams like Bolton and Blackburn not allowed to go away to le'Arse and make tackles. Is defending to be outlawed under new rules set out by Wenger and Fabragas.

I'm sorry but tackling and defending are just as much part of the game as tricks and flicks. Perhaps if Wenger new this he might find his team being more than just a cup side.

Never heard him complaining when Veira and co were putting themselves about did you?

Wenger likes to play the blame game after a bad result, negative tactics, time wasting, to many games,young squad, referee's etc etc.

Well Arsene its your job to break teams down,everybody has at some stage played down the clock, and if your team lacks experience thats up to you.

Lets hope he's rolling out the excuses come next sunday.