Age Shall Not Weary Them

[Dorset]

….nor, it seems, shall it diminish the Media respect now showering over them like poppies cascading down from a higher and far more respectful place than they once occupied. I refer, of course, to ‘them’, the Well-Known Warriors named Scholes and Henry, and the current unashamed heralding of the benefits to be had by recalling players with ’experience’ to certain, never to be forgotten, top teams in the Premiership. If it isn’t Paul Scholes popping up again and popping on a ManU shirt in one moment, it’s Thierry Henry doing exactly the same thing for the Arse in another… only with greater panache. Not that the degree of resurrection is of paramount importance to our spellbound bearers of news in print, because for them, at this stage of the game, it is all about beating a hasty retreat from the criticism dished out to the old faithful at Stamford Bridge, both last season and this, for having ageing [now called ‘experienced’] players with far too many years under their corpulent belts.

Time then, perhaps, for some reality remembrance of how these scribes latched on to Ferguson’s comments on the advanced years of Frank Lampard, Didier Drogba, Petr Cech, John Terry, Alex and Nicolas Anelka, thereafter to mire them in a soupy description of ever-increasing slowness on the pitch, with no mention whatsoever of ‘experience’ crossing their dismissive pages. Also, I would suggest, there is a need to ask what has brought all this old soldierly turnabout and why such puffed-up pride-driven punditry now exists. Initial thoughts turn instinctively, involving favourable light and the shedding of it on an ancient knight’s ability to run a tight Old Trafford ship full of jolly tars, none of whom have ever been even the slightest bit brushed by old age - up until now, that is.

Unsurprisingly, in these turbulent Mancunian times, we are told (by The Telegraph amongst others) that Ferguson sanctioned Scholes’s return amid concerns over ’the first-team squad paying the price for the loss of over 2000 games worth of senior experience since last season’. Hmmm, surely this little nugget of information ignores the fact that, when we last looked, Rio Ferdinand, Ryan Giggs and Patrice Evra were still trotting manfully about the park carrying oodles of game-playing experience in their knowledgeable heads. Whether due to war wound or not, let’s also dismiss Rio’s forgetfulness for longer than he blanked the drug-testers and conclude that there’s more than enough know-how left for your average team of young gun supplementation to learn lessons from, let alone the exceptionally talented lot we were reliably informed had been purchased by United last summer. Therefore, in reality, the price being paid at Old Trafford at the moment is not related to lack of experience in the slightest, it’s actually down to the price being paid by the Glazers, when repaying interest on loans. Put bluntly, it’s squeezing the life out of new, albeit older and classier, recruitment and as a direct result has forced the fielding of the faded rather than the fresh.

Meanwhile, over at the Emirates and with similar old timers timing, the opportunity arose for Henry to arise from the dead and he duly took it with a certain amount of aplomb - against Leeds, once again in the most important of our cup competitions. Indeed, perhaps this non-age-related fact has more significance than most observers could possibly imagine and in future resurrections will be merely for the duration and necromancy of an FA Cup run. I do hope so, because if the creaking limbs of Messrs Scholes and Henry were to ever get to grips with papering over the current cracks in the Premiership aspirations of their respective clubs we might have to have rethink our transfer policy along with that of our partner in big-spending crime at the Etihad Stadium…

Just think, gone will be the days of spending vast sums of money on inexperienced 26 year-olds, never mind naïve no-hopers who have still got more than a couple of decades to go before they reach their prime - at around the age of thirty-five, presumably. Quite frankly, what would be the point of investing in youth? With 34 being the new 24 and superstardom arriving so late in life as to render the long term contract obsolete, you would find the canny manager waiting until the worst years were over for a player (probably between 18 and 30) before splashing the cash, safe in the knowledge that, for the last five years of the then experienced player’s career, he’d be getting the most return for his money.

Of course, the battle-hardened pragmatist might say that a lot of lower division managers have been adopting this philosophy for years and raise the slight concern as to why none of them, as yet, have taken any Conference team, chock-full as most are with prime quality experience, on a marauding spree through the divisions, onwards and upwards to Premiership and Champions League glory. Doubtless a minor detail for fawning hacks in their current non-ageist thrall, but nonetheless a factor to consider before paying a king’s ransom for someone called Methuselah who, at 969 years of age, might just be the kiddie to add that little bit of experience to your midfield.

[erskblue]

David Weir was a regular for Rangers (until he got injured in the autumn) since he arrived from Everton in January 2007. Think he's 41.

[flasher10]

Well, i'm absolutely certain that the press would be delighted if we were to bring back an old favourite - Gianfranco Zola.

We could then get on with getting rid of ageing wasters like John Terry and Petr Cech who are surely past it - until we bring them back again. Then they will be celebrated in the press like Thierry and Scholesy.

Mind you, there is a great showbiz saying: "Always leave them wanting more".

[SHELLY]

Ah yes Fergies famous mind games our squad were deemed too old a season ago, now the 70 years young Fergie appears to have changed his tune...As for Henry I will always remember the classy French aristocrat* for dumping his Mrs and child, and cheating the Irish...

*The newspapers seem to think if you are enigmatic (rude and arrogant) and have a French accent you exude class..