....and nights like that are the reason

Lets forget for a minute all the controversy of last night. I know its gonna haunt me the rest of the summer and beyond, but try to put it aside for a moment.

I am so proud to follow this team.

Yesterday, I wore my Joe Cole top to work and got plenty of questions. Questions about Chelsea, about football, etc, but one fella in particular decided to try and wind me up about it. This guy is nothing more than a casual joker who likes to push buttons, but he insisted that football was a boring sport which puts him to sleep when he tries to watch it. After laughing him off and insisting "Its more exciting and requires more skill than X, Y, and Z sport that you watch" I soon forgot about what he said. He was just trying to rankle me a bit.

Yesteday evening, I watched the match on a 4 hour tape delay in a local bar (began at midnight, GMT) along with a bunch of plonkers of all ages, races, shapes and sizes. Most of them were not Barca fans, but practically all of them were cheering for Barca. I spent all day with a stomach in knots, and spent the 2 hours of the game picking over a salad i didnt want, tapping my feet and legs nervously and sweating bullets everytime they got the ball and went forward. I was in extacy when Essien scored. When Iniesta scored, I wanted to walk into traffic outside. That, or take a chair to the faces twats that were having a parade behind me. I just wanted the earth to swallow me up whole.

I got back home (with my very understanding girlfriend) and went straight to bed. But I couldnt really fall asleep for a couple of hours. My mind kept turning to the match, to the goals, the decisions, the reaction of the players. All of it ran through my head over and over, though I was trying to suppress it. The other thing I kep thinking about was that Arsenal fan in Kenya, who reportedly hung himself after his team lost. I couldnt get that guy out of my mind. And then I mustve been on the verge of sleep, becasuse I had one of those moments of clarity.

The f**king idiot at my workplace missed the point of football, or indeed of sport, alltogether. It isnt just about what happens between the white lines or on tv. Its about everything that goes along with it. Tears, joy, anger, love, hatred, frustration, hero worship, adulation, etc etc etc. Its about the drama, the human emotions, and the camraderie that make you feel like you are a part of something bigger. Some say its only a game. It is a game, but its so much more than that. Because when youre there, in your seat, or watching your tv, or in the pub, its everything in the whole wide world. Perspective means nothing between those whistles.

I felt lower than low last night after having an accelerated heart rate all day. Was it worth it? Youre f**king right it was, because it made me feel alive. It made me feel like I was part of something. I knew that my heart was breaking, but that thousands of hearts on this site and millions more in the wider world were doing the exact same thing. Im not justifying what that guy in Kenya did, hanging himself, but it broke my heart thinking about the man, dead in his Arsenal shirt, because I just wish I couldve talked to him and said "I understand. I have been there too. We have all been there." Becasue we have all been there. Its just a matter of how many times we have experienced that heartbreak or joy. And I dont know if I have some kind of sick emotional massochism, but its after nights like this that I am proudest.

Why am I proud? Because our players, managers and club give us the opportunity to feel like this every week, and sometimes more. This team was written off by myself and many more three months ago. Somehow, management acted swiftly, made the right decisions despite the financial cost, and gave us as fans yet another season we will probably never forget. Some of them lost their cool last night. I wasnt happy about that, but I can completely understand their reactions.

They tried their damnest. They took Barca, media, whoever's criticism for weeks now, and they put in a performance that should have seen them through to the final. Why they arent there, well, I suspect youll have to ask Michel Platini. But they have taken what was looking like a disasterous season, during which they were getting slagged from all corners, and managed to fight their way back into respectability on all fronts. And they will be back next year and beyond. It might be a new manager, probably some new faces among the team, but you can bet your sweet ass they will be back, and they will deliver that trophy one day. And when they do, I hope the first people they thank are a series of scandanavian officials, Michel Platini, and every dipper that has ever opened their mangy gob. It will happen one day. I sincerely believe it

They gave their all last night but it wasnt enough (It was, but history wont record that) but that doesnt change anything one iota for me. I love this team, I love our players, our staff, our owner, and all our fans. That is the kind of empathy, belonging, and fraternal bond that money cannot and never will be able to buy. And that is my silver lining for the day

Roll on May 30th

Why am I proud? Because our players, managers and club give us the opportunity to feel like this every week, and sometimes more. This team was written off by myself and many more three months ago. Somehow, management acted swiftly, made the right decisions despite the financial cost, and gave us as fans yet another season we will probably never forget. Some of them lost their cool last night. I wasnt happy about that, but I can completely understand their reactions.

They tried their damnest. They took Barca, media, whoever's criticism for weeks now, and they put in a performance that should have seen them through to the final. Why they arent there, well, I suspect youll have to ask Michel Platini. But they have taken what was looking like a disasterous season, during which they were getting slagged from all corners, and managed to fight their way back into respectability on all fronts. And they will be back next year and beyond. It might be a new manager, probably some new faces among the team, but you can bet your sweet ass they will be back, and they will deliver that trophy one day. And when they do, I hope the first people they thank are a series of scandanavian officials, Michel Platini, and every dipper that has ever opened their mangy gob. It will happen one day. I sincerely believe it.

Hear hear.

Westway, that was a great post. I felt alone in the world, have done since last night, but to know I belong to a large, faithful and passionate group of people helps lessen the hurt.

Thank you.

Thanks midland, youre definitely not alone. I was lost last night, and I couldnt even clear my head to think straight about anything. But all these media arse lickers who have it out for us better get their laughs in now because its gonna be John Terry hoisting that trophy in royal blue some day

I was just trying to help everyone around here see something positive in all this.

Thanks Westway.

You know, when we do see John Terry hoisting that trophy, it's going to be so much sweeter that it would have been this year.

Great post TheWestwayWonder, one that I totally agree with. What last night and Moscow has done is strengthened my love for the club. Chelsea is a great club that has a great future. The players were magnificent last night and did not deserve what happened to them. It is my deepest hope and wish that the club are able to win the Champions League one day.

I honestly believe last night is worse than Moscow. Everything went against us, other than Essien's goal.

Great post, Westway, so glad I have this place to talk to a crowd I know feel exactly the same way.

Thank you, The Shed End Forum!! :)

Great post Westway enjoyed reading it .

Very, very cruel mistress football can take you to the heights of ecstasy and then plunge you to the depths of despair . Yet we all come back for more. 1 minute from Rome , 1 slip away from putting the penalty away to win it in Moscow, one ghost goal given against us at Anfield

On finding out Lord Seb Coe was a Chelsea fan a wise pundit made the following observation which has stood the test of time “ Chelsea fan eh ? They’ll break your heart “

that sums it up well, football is a cruel mistress and she has been absolute witch to us in this competition.

But I know I speak for you all when I say that I wouldnt trade in following this team, the memories I have, or the emotions i have felt for all the world. Even after that shambles

Cheers guys

Edited May 8, 200917 yr by TheWestwayWonder

The f**king idiot at my workplace missed the point of football, or indeed of sport, alltogether. It isnt just about what happens between the white lines or on tv. Its about everything that goes along with it. Tears, joy, anger, love, hatred, frustration, hero worship, adulation, etc etc etc. Its about the drama, the human emotions, and the camraderie that make you feel like you are a part of something bigger. Some say its only a game. It is a game, but its so much more than that. Because when youre there, in your seat, or watching your tv, or in the pub, its everything in the whole wide world. Perspective means nothing between those whistles.

That's the best explanation I've ever read on being a supporter! ;)

Brilliant brilliant post,you sum up why we love the game, i miss more than anything being young enough to play the game again, that true brotherhood feeling on the field,in the pub etc,now its substituted by the roller coaster emotions of following my beloved Chelsea,its something my GF cannot get her head around,and apologies to the brilliant female supporters on here,but in my experience it seems uniquely a male thing,that we take football so f**king serious,its a very tribal feeling,watching and suffering your heroes doing there stuff,its a boys own dream to be a JT or lamps,to be hero worshipped must be a very humbling experience,and envy is a sin we would all break,i wasn't as upset as last years final,more numb at trying to unravel what i had just watched,sure we should of buried them chances, and not rely on 50/50 calls for a ref to give what were certain pens,but the ref can only say yes or no.

Chelseas luck will change,and it will taste all the more sweeter,remember how we thought liverscum had the hex on us,well we put that to sleep,manure will suffer at our hands as well ,but just "Keep the Faith",and make sure your hearts beats blue for the team.

apologies to the brilliant female supporters on here,but in my experience it seems uniquely a male thing,that we take football so f**king serious,its a very tribal feeling,watching and suffering your heroes doing there stuff

Now you've hurt my feelings :P I don't fly into London for matches and p*ss-ups just because I like Easyjet so much, you know! And you'd better stay away from Gem too, if you hold your life dear :lol:

just got goosebumps

Now you've hurt my feelings :P I don't fly into London for matches and p*ss-ups just because I like Easyjet so much, you know! And you'd better stay away from Gem too, if you hold your life dear :lol:

I did apologise to the ladies and expect that sort of backlash,but i did say in my experience,the majority of women i know detest football, cannot make the connection between something that i live for (foootball) seem so trivial, so i made the assumption,and now fear for my nads.lol...........sssssoryyy