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One for you, Pauly:


Elliott
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unfortunately it is a recurring trend not juist in Football. Honestly, out here in the States there are massive brawls that have broken out over high school and Junior High Football games (gridiron). Fathers making their kids practice until they take the fun out of the game, screaming at their own kids, making them feel worthless etc.

I am a pro golfer (well, I was) and will never pressure my kids, should I have any, into taking up a sport just because I used to play it. A lot a parents see their children as achance for them (the parents) to live out their failed dreams...dad just missed making it as a baseball player so goes to every little league game and yells like the talent scouts are watching, hoping junior can hit the home run in the bottom of the ninth!

Anyway, It is terrible that these parents put so much pressure on their kids, as they often burn the kids out, and cause even furhter resentment. Their is a young Pro golfer out here in the states (think the last name is Ohair), whos father used to train this kid relentlessly. rewarded him minimally if the kid played and made birdies, but punnished him severly for every bogey the kid made (made him run a mile per bogey, etc). The father also saw his kid as a commodity, and forced him into signing an agreement that the father would eb entitled to a percentage of the child's future golf earnings.

Of course, because the kid was too young to fully realize what he was signing, the father didn't have a leg to stand on when Ohair made his first tournament cheque. now the kid and his dad never speak. Sad waht this "driven" fahter has done to the family that should have provided the kid with love and support throughout the childs career.

Now, I cana lso say, show me a person who doesn't mind losing, and I will show you a loser. But to push a child to such anextent that they run away, take out law suits, etc.....it's terrible, and non conducive to rewarding a child for being good at something they enjoy

Scott

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Dear Scott,

Rubbish- how are young kids to become the next baggio if they do not practice until their shins become sore?

Only joking! Seriously though, i think the majority of parents in football just want to give their kids the head-start, the advice from their years playing that they were given over an extended period of time, quickly, before their kids even begin, so they can start with all the knowledge they built up over their lives/careers and become better than they! and thus more happy?

It's like moving to a new city, if you have to find out where to look for food and a job and a house yourself, you are going to waste a lot of time than if somebody could simply let you begin from a higher point.

I have a laisser faire and encouraging attitude which most parents hate- they want their football coaches to be demanding and challenging and make their kids show some character as that's what they see sport as about. I see it more as... i'll have enthusiasm, train hard and give you the platform to do so too, if you want to. Doesn't really work with a team atmosphere and 20 kids- hence my 1-9 record, negative 48 billion goal difference- but next season it will change. oh yes. there will be more blood in my training sessions than in a tarrantino film.

pauly

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I agree to an extent Pauly, I am all for a parent sharing knowledge, but not forcing their kids in hopes the can vicariously live their dreams (failed) of professional athleticism through their kids without the kids really being that thrilled on the idea anyway

Scott

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I think there is a massive problem in just about all junior sports that I have been involved with - parents wanting to live out their own unfulfilled sporting ambitions through their children. In my opinion, this is what leads to things like the touchline punch-ups and the like.

If you ask me, the solution is simple. If you have a child who is showing a bit of ability in a particular sport, and wants to persue it, then as a parent, you need to step back and hand over responsibility for coaching to a PROFESSIONAL coach.

Sure, there are good and bad professional coaches out there, but just about all parents make bad coaches, as it is a very difficult think to draw the line between your responsibilities as a coach and a parent - which have very different objectives.

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