Sharpy

I remember reading somewhere that Luiz would one day like to play for Barca. I really hope this isn't true though. He was a massive presence on the pitch for us last season. He is 100% future captain for me. I hope this doesn't turn into a Rooney/Saurez saga - Jose AND Luiz need to shut Barca down in our next conference with a big and loud NOT FOR SALE, f**k OFF.

I think most people would agree he was past his best when we signed him, and even at his best he was still probably not worth £50 million.

Seriously though, you are about to get banned, and i'd really like us to continue this in the near future, maybe 2 or 3 months into the season, can you post your twitter so we can all drop by then?

I'm trying to figure out if he's actually 8 years old or has some kind of brain disorder that makes him think he's being funny when he rewrites peoples names like FiteyMeeeThenernio.

I'll wager this guy only came here to vent some steam as his trash team under his trash manager just drew with another trash opponent.

And who does it consist of now that is so special? Really, Bebe? Anderson? 2 wins from 7 pre-season games. 10 goals conceded against massively inferior opposition. We all appreciate that pre-season doesn't mean *that* much, but please make sure to stick around so we can hear your comments after your first 5 games where Chelsea, Swansea, Liverpool and Man City will show you Manure scum just how f**king useless you are going to be without SAF.

Rooney won't sign, Torres will lead the front line and have a better season than last season, probably 10-15 league goals, similiar to what Lukaku will get. You heard it here first.

Everyones talking about Mazacar/KDB but Moses has been a delight on the USA tour so far.

Lovely

Torres still best striker we have in my opinion.

GET HOME, KDB!

Hazard is giving me f**king goosebumps, he is gong to terrorize defendrs next sason.

Essien looking sharp again tonight... Hope he keeps up this form for the start of season. Looks like Torres is only one (from confed boys) not getting a run out tonight unless he takes a midfielder off...

Essien for Oscar, Mark for Cech, Mata for Moses. Not sure how were lining up now. Edit: Rami gone wing, Essien middle. Mata no 10.

Moses is having a helluva game.

Getting good at that pen, Haz is.

OSCAR. Lovely.

Yeah, they need to kick off already, falling asleep here... work at 7am

Ivano - Cahill - Terry - Cole Ramires - Van Ginkel Moses - Oscar - Hazard Lukaku Excited to see Oscar start, would of liked to see some of the other CONFED boys but I think they'll all make an appearance.

No.

Yeah I guess I'll have too, just wanted a better quality. Then again, not like the Chelsea TV quality is great either.

I give up on the pile of w**k that is Chelsea TV. I had problems a few weeks back on the day of a game and had to email customer service who took two days to get it rectified (had to use a stream to watch game). Now the bloody thing won't let me login, just keeps looping back to login page.

I think there are many things that give Jose a headache but welcoming back some of his star players to training? He will be relishing the opportunity to work with them at last.

My dear child, you appear to be misinformed. There are some things that do get me mad in this world, like poverty, and terrorism. However people who have clearly been failed by society I generally find amusing.

I am actually sick of logging in to the football pages only to find another article about Saurez or Rooney. They must of made a "Moyes will not sell" article about six times this week - we get it - Moyes doesn't want to sell Rooney - please find something else to write about or don't write at all.