Mike O

Funily enough, Amazon delivered my replacement copy of 8 Legged Groove Machine yesterday (used to have it on cassette). God, I love that album. Specific to 83-86, Loz, great calls on The Waterboys and The Pogues. Fisherman's Blues is still my fave album by the former but did you rate World Party (Karl Wallinger's offshoot)? Ship of Fools was a great track. As for the latter, I met them in 84/85 when they were supporting Costello on the Goodbye Cruel World tour. Blagged my way into the after gig party and got arsed with Spider and Steve Nieve. Stiil got the Rothmans he offered me.... Another I missed off was The The. Soul Mining and Infected are still amazing. You're also right to bring up REM. Murmur is still their finest, I think (esp Pilgrimage) but King of Birds on Document stands as one of the most astonishing songs ever written. And me and my mate still play 'Superman' at weddings and barmitvahs.... I'm in random 80s heaven...

Following the heated debate in the Brits thread over the Smiths, Oasis etc, I have decided it's finally time to offer some enlightenment to you crazy youngsters on mid 80's indie cool. I am uniquely able to make these judgements because I myself was a very, very cool frontman of a hip Norwich outfit called Gorgeous. We were a post-modern hybrid of Dexys meets The Beach Boys meets The Shngri-las meets a car crash and consisted of two guitars, bass, drums, two saxes and two backing singers. We were awesome (before 'awesome' was even a word...). Our hits (in Norwich) included 'I'm Too Damn Gorgeous' and 'Natalina' and you can still find us on a number of limited edition compilation albums and EPs probably still 'on offer' in Andys Records of Norwich. Anyway, we did actually have quite a following (of irate feminists, if I remember rightly) so got invited to support a load of visiting indie bands. Because of this, my amp has actually played with some very cool names, including Billy Bragg. So with no further ado, here is my conclusive top 10 of the coolest indie bands to visit Norwich between those halcyon years of 1983 to 1986. 10. The Red Guitars. Brilliant outfit from Hull who had a top 50 smash with the incredible 'Good Technology'. Lovely socialist blokes to boot. 9. We've got a Fuzzbox and We're Going to Use it. Crazy, big haired indie chicks who couldn't play a note but looked great and had dimples. I failed miserably to get off with one of them as I reclaimed my amp. 8. Scritti Politti. Green Gartside was just about the coolest and best looking bloke on the planet in 1984. Because of him, one of the guys I lived with spent ?200 on a pair of Catherine Hamnett trousers which I may have spilt red wine over... 7. Aztec Camera. High Land Hard Rain was the album to take round to a girls room to 'help' study together. 'Oblivious' is still a superb track...and the sod was only 16 when he wrote it. 6. The Woodentops. Brilliant live band. All I remember at one of their gigs was singing their hit, Love Train' at the top of my voice to the point wherein I lost it for the next day. 5. The Shop Assistants. A band consisting of a bloke and 3 grungy girls, all of whom I loved through a cider inflicted haze. The cover of 'Train from Kansas City' is a must. 4. The Mighty Lemon Drops. Genius band, genius songs. If they'd been around 10 years later they would have been a major component of Britpop. Think Oasis with talent. 3. The Smiths. Didn't support them but saw them in 83 just as This Charming Man was charting and met them afterwards. They were supported by The Red Guitars (who I prefered on the night) but were still great. For the record, 'Hand in Glove' is still one of the greatets singles of all time. I was mistaken for Mozza on many an occasion owing to my enormous fringe and shaven back of head. 2. Orange Juice. It is hard to over-emphasise just how cool Orange Juice (and Postcard in general) were in the early 80s. They inspired a million male students to buy the complete works of the Velvet Underground and then get themselves a guitar. When they played at Norwich, they were officially the most pissed band I have ever seen in my life (or stoned...or both...). Brilliant 1. The Jesus and Mary Chain. The JAMC were the apotheosis of cool. Black clothes, disgruntled heroin addled veins, industrial scots, Beach Boys melodies and feedback that ripped your ears to pieces. w**kers on stage (20 min gigs a speciality) but the albums....Wow. I've just re-bought the B sides album just to get my hands on 'Sidewalking' again. So there you have it - I've missed off some notable players, namely The Red Skins, Everything But the Girl and Einsturzende Neubaten but you can't have everything. Now, I seem to remember I have a job to do around here somewhere....

Oasis ripped up the song-writing rule book, in my eyes. Before twat Gallagher came along, budding songwriters would desperately try not to re-write someone else's song at any cost. They'd even start again should a mate point out that they'd done just that. Not our Noel though. If anyone seriously thinks ther first two albums are any good, I suggest they invest their hard earned spondoolies in the works of The Beatles, T Rex, The Jam and Neil Innes (check out his song 'How Sweet to Be an Idiot' to feel more than a twinge of recognition). Oh, here it is. Nick Hornby summed it up best when he pointed out that the Beatles sounded like a collision of all music from the last 100 years, from R&B to classical, from victorian music hall to skiffle, from Elvis to Elgar. And Oasis, he mused, sounded like.....The Beatles. Tossers

From the point of view of a K's fan..... Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!

Cheers mate - it appears me and Joe have only got 21 points each so we'll have to wait for Feb 19th to see if there are any left.... Oh joy

In advance of the rush for League Cup final tickets, any idea AT ALL on how you can see how many loyalty points you've got on your membership? I've been through the official site a couple of times but can't see any pointers. Help please...

Au contraire, mon ami. Pleanty of K's fans love the MK Dons (some have even bought shirts) because it winds the hell out of our landlords, AFC Wimbledon - aka 'Franchise FC'. Tee hee

Best: 1. Chelsea vs Liverpool, FA Cup 1997 (4-2) 2. Cheslea vs Stuttgart CWC final 1998 (1-0) 3. Man Utd vs Chelsea 1995 (1-2) 4. Chelsea vs Spurs 1993 (3-2) 5. Chelsea vs Bruges 1993/4 (best atmosphere of all time, STILL!) Worst 1. Marseille vs Chelsea (teargas time)

As the CSR's official Beatles nut, there is a defence for this. Macca had just written and released, prompted by Bloody Sunday, a wee ditty called 'Give Ireland Back To The Irish' which was immediately banned by the BBC. In a fit of pique he released 'Mary Had a Little Lamb' very quickly afterwards as an insult to the Beeb and as a two fingered gesture to the establishment. Unfortunately, as witnessed by 'When I'm 64', 'Obladi-Oblada' etc, he's rather good at writing kiddy songs and this charted immediately, leaving behind it any vestage of political capital or biting wit.

are you sure it was The Jam and not this ? http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/ilove/years/1 ... clip.shtml absloutley not ! I reckon you're one of the boater-wearing toffs in 'Eton Rifles'...? Although that would make you about 45 and I seem to remember thinking that I may have a few years on you? Or were you that Tracey lass (backing singer on Beat Surrender) before you had the op? She also had a very minor hit with 'The House That Jack Built'

Can't believe this anti-Undertones vibe. Aside from Teenage Kicks, Jimmy Jimmy and My Perfect Cousin, you've also got.... 1. Here Comes The Summer 2. You've Got My Number 3. Wednesday Week 4. Got to Have You Back 5. There Goes Norman And they gave rise to That Petrol Emotion.

Prefab Sprout - words cannot express how much I used to hate this disinfected MOR disguised as intelligent music. But I loved 'Faron Young'. U2 - God I loathe these tossers. Single-handedly responsible for taking music into the incredible realms of 'the most important weapon in the battle against injustice, poverty, hatred and murder. My thoughts obviously count for nothing since they're fronted by Jesus. Love 'Angel of Harlem', though. Oasis - As a songwriter myself, I've always made it my mission to discard any tune I pen which sounds anything remotely like someone else's. Not a maxim that Noel Gallagher's ever worried about, mind. His band are the champions of thick ugly original behaviour which I deplore. 'Half a World Away' is wonderful, though. More to follow....

I never took the Police seriously. A two dimensional pop band nodding towards reggae in a manner that made the Clash and early UB40 look like bona fide Kingston outfits. Reading John Peel's biography, he had no time for them either and refused to play any of their stuff on his shows once he'd seen them live. Having said that, 'I Can't Stand Losing You' and 'So Lonely' are crackers...

I started off with a Commodore Amiga in 1990 (not influenced by CFC one bit!) and we are now an Xbox 360 house, so here is a top ten of my all time faves.... 1. The Secret of Monkey Island (all of them) 2. Speedball 3. Indiana Jones and The Lost Emperor 4. Fifa 05 5. Return to Castle Wolfenstein 6. Project Gotham (360) 7. Star Wars Tie Fighter 8. Command and Conquer (all of them) 9. Brian Lara Cricket (bloody impossible) 10. SSX Tricky God, I feel old

A mate of mine is a youth team coach at Cobham and from what he tells me, you get the impression that Clarke is a lot of the glue that holds the first team squad and the academy together. He also infers that Clarke is universally respected and liked by the whole coaching staff and players. And he's my all-time favourite right back.

Would that 'out of position' be akin to 'on an English football pitch'? Just asking....

I think my only major misigiving re Paulo is that he obviously spends too much time on his hair. As I write, I'm listening to a Style Council retrospective and can't help feeling that PF would have fitted in very well on bass, what with his thick boyish brunette floppy fringe and his probable love of cafe expresso.... I look forward to next Xmas' Armani ads, in which Sheva and Paulo run in a slow motion grainy black and white fashion across the 'dunes' of Cobham, tripping and falling in laughter and tears, all to the tune of 'You're the best Thing'. God, I should be in advertising. Oh, hang on...

Weah is out by dint of the fact that he scored vs Spurs automatically ensuring a place in our hearts....

And the manager? There's only one Claudio (ducking for cover now....)

As it stands today, I don't think we've ever experienced the sort of gulf that exists between expectation vs performance than we do with Sheva. Sure, it can all change (God, please...), but currently he's first on the team sheet. Laudrup was a genius footballer but then came to CFC and couldn't be arsed - so much so he retired after two or three months. Ballack, in my mind, is in the same camp. And Casiraghi is in because he was a gent and a grafter who found it hard to adapt to the EPL, and then just as he was getting the hang of it, had to retire. Now that's disappointing!

And now, the annual review of gut-wrenchingly disappointing performances (vs expectation). This is as distinct to general awfulness. I can only give an 18 year perspective but I have it on good authority that in the early and mid 80's, the club had no expectations anyway; so here's my XI: GK: Bosnich D: Pannuci D: Bogarde D: Del Horno M: Veron M: Deschamps M: Ballack M: Laudrup A: Sutton A: Sheva A. Fleck Subs: Casiraghi / Kezman I tell you, it's bloody difficult finding central defenders who have been 'disappointing' since they don't tend to get that many matches. Anyway, let's be having your nominations

Just for the record.... - Chelsea underperforming? - Rubbish Xmas results? - War between chairman and manager? - War between manager and high profile player? - Various fans throwing toys out of prams? Feels like home again!

Bluebeard suggested Rod Stewart - I'd Rather Go Blind (Etta James) so completely negating his opinions on any other matter on these boards. Absolutely shocking! Here are some Elvis (Costello) options worthy of consideration: 1. Leave My Kitten Alone (Blood and Chocolate out-take) 2. Knowing Me, Knowing You (Performed on the B&C tour, 86) 3. She (as in Notting Hill) 4. What Do I Do Now? (Sleeper) 5. What's So funny about Peace Love and Understanding? 6. Many rivers to cross 7. Walking on thin ice (Ono) 8. Don't Let me be misunderstood 9. Hot Burrito No. 2 (I'm your toy) 10. My funny valentine 11. I can't stand up for falling down 12. Sweet Dreams There are about 100 more but I'm currently too pissed to recall them!

For reference, the K's fixture list can be found here

Oh wow - how funky can y'all get??? The only one I'd change would be to put Bootsy Collins on Bass Stay cool kev As I was driving to my meeting this morning, it suddenly hit me that I bloody meant Bootsy, not George. Schoolboy error..... And I've decided to replace Stevie with Sly Stone.... And Isaac Hayes will also be on keyboards... And to cap it off, I'll have JB's horns YOWSA!