Blue Celery

I think I need to fly back.

Son of a... By the way, I never did really say a proper goodbye to everyone. The group sitting at the table behind us were talking about Vegas, and one fairly pissed bloke said "You're Chelsea but you're still coming to Vegas with us!" as I guess he thought it funny to yell that at a complete stranger. I then told them in my most Orange County surfer brah American accent they could all meet me there in two weeks as I'm making the drive for a friends birthday.....dude. They handed me a Jagerbomb. Then they handed me another. Then we got more drinks. Then everyone decided to find another place to go to. At that point, it felt to me that only 5 or 10 minutes had passed since The Shed End got up to go inside. So as me and this group walk in, I expect to see all of you sitting inside.......whoops! Now I'm here with some real posh west londoners looking to go to a night club somewhere on Dawes rd., which we do. We get to the door and nobody wants to pay the £5 or £10 to get in. Superb. So we go to a different pub and drink some more, then we part ways. I have to lead myself back to Earls Court on Redcliffe Gardens. Mind you I'm pissed, at 2:30ishAM second day in London having to navigate. But I got there in due time, after deciding to just walk Earls Court for another half hour.

Cheers Ethical. It was truly a fantastic night out. The CPO lunch really is special. I have to clear up the amount though. It was actually $5000. The cheque had the £ sign next to the number, but said "Dollars" on the written line. A bit confusing. Still though, the $5000 was raised on the tour through signed photo auctions, donations, and a portion of every ticket we sold as a supporters group went into the pot as well. This 5 grand was in addition to the money we raised to bring Tommy Langley, Jock Finnieston and Neil Barnett over to tag along with us and do Q&A's, and to basically just be drunk with us in four cities. Just knowing that the donation would be going to the Past Players Trust made me feel proud. It's just a feeling knowing you're helping out the likes of Roy Bentley who needs those Doctor visits among other things. Great stuff. The CPO itself was great. I had become good mates with Langley, Jock and Spy in the USA, but this was my chance to finally meet Tambling, Shellito, Cannoville, Walks, Wee Pat and Roy Bentley. These were the players that I had interviewed months ago (which reminds me to get my ass in gear and post them). Sadly, Pat Nevin did not make it, but other than that I met them all and chatted it up. It started in the morning getting ready and dressing smartly to look good and maybe even pull a bird. All I will say about that subject, is if/when I do get married, it will be to a British gal. ....Or maybe even to a girl from Cork....that could be trouble but.... Anyways we went down to Marco's Restaraunt right outside the Shed Hotel and everyone was there, JFH, Dixon...the whole lot. One thing I learned this past summer was that if Langley and Finnieston were any example, then most if not all of the past players would be 100% approachable and easy going. That is the truth. I went right up to Flo and introduced myself. Instead of saying hello and carrying on, he talked with me for nearly 5 minutes. My neck hurt after that conversation. Dude is a tower. I caught some video of Neil interviewing The Cat, and as I'm doing that Wisey struts in giving hugs to everyone. He was the only one I didn't meet. Angry at myself for that one, but I'll save that for next year. On to the lunch. It was held at the Bridge this year as years previous they would hold it elsewhere. After some complaints about the cost, the suits decided to keep it at home this year and all I heard from people was that it surpassed past lunches due to the location (easy to get to the Bridge) and the cost. That was one of the jokes made after the night... The good thing about the CPO lunch was that the beer was free, the problem with the CPO lunch was that the beer was free. :D Matt Lorenzo hosted and was great even for a West Ham fan. Bruce Buck was THE funniest man of the night. Holy sh*te. He was hilarious and not very many people saw it coming. One of his comments was about the stadium name change and he poked fun at St. James' [email protected]. He said not to worry about us though, as he as already suggested the Stadium name "We F*cking Hate Tottenham." Cheers all around. Wise said later that one thing money can't buy is a funny Chairman. True. An intermission after the main course allowed me to get up and finally grab some autographs. I always think it's a bit annoying to see people who are just there for photo op's and signatures. Like they don't even know who they're getting to sign or don't really care. If I don't recognize a past player, I don't have him scribble unlegibly in my book to leave me scratching my head later. I want to get to know them before that. So on that run I got historian Rick Glanville to sign, John Sparrow, Neil Shipperley, Scotty Minto, Keith Dublin and King Canners, Gary slick hair Stanley, little Ian Britton and Chopper. At that point, one of the event girls grabbed my arm and pointed me in the direction of Beth who was headed to the stage, for we were on in 5. Dropped my book at the table, grabbed my jacket and walked backstage where Bruce Buck was waiting. The cheque was one of the big ones that Happy Gilmore shoved in his back seat during the PGA tour against Shooter McGavin. (Had to work that one in). Only like I said before, there was a £ sign instead of a $. :angry: Either way, Lorenzo announced it as $5000 and called us up holding the big thing. Nobody mentioned that we were going to be interviewed, and so as Loren starts asking a question to Beth, I'm thinking...great, here I am in front of 600+ including legends, their families, Chelsea suits and seasoned supporters. The question he asked was to be expected. "Why Chelsea?" As a "foreign" supporter that's always what you hear from anyone and everyone. My answer was simple. "This," I said as I pointed all around, and made a comment about Chelsea being more than a club, a family. Pointed out that they should ask Langley and Jock about the summer tour, but that I wasn't sure they would remember most of it. Buck comes on stage and we shake his hand. He says a few words and then we all hold the cheque up for the photo. I spoke to a couple people from ChelseaTV and they said they would sort out the clip and the photo. I'm sure it will take time but I'll be so happy when it arrives. Of course the headline grabber was JT's appearance, but sadly the surprise was kind of ruined for me as I saw the lunch agenda a week previous when they told us we'd be presenting. No worries, because when our former skippers Bentley, Chopper, Wise all filed out to sit down, there was one empty seat. I think the crowd knew what was going to happen, but still didn't believe it. Out he came and the applause sounded. It was great to see all four sitting down having a chat and a laugh. Bentley bless his heart still has so much energy and loved every second of it. After the lunch ended we all migrated back to Marco's to get pissed. And even more an hour later across the way at Frankie's. I had a laugh as I walked in, because Kalou was sitting at a table near the door having dinner with some bird. He had already paid the bill and was just about to leave. As he walks out I give him a nod and thumbs up as I didn't want to disrupt his game. He smiled and walked out the doors where 2 people recognized him...then 3...then 7...then...uh oh. Get your camera's and pens out!! Poor Sala, smiling as much as possible. He must have not realized that the CPO was going on. Either way he was a damn good sport and hung out with the fans for a bit. From there we went to the So Bar, and it was there and around that area that I realized my wife must be English. (Unless of course Valerie wants to throw her name in the hat.) I think my heart is still somewhere in Fulham. Drinks all around and one by one the legends and supporters began to fade, walking...stumbling...being helped out of the door back to the hotel. I was last man standing with a couple young ladies from Cork who were friends of the Tamblings. Very fun people walking back drunk to the hotel. Good times. Up the lift we went to the Hotel bar and I found out that we indeed were not the last people standing. Ian Britton and Gary Stanley were knocking them back with a couple of supporters from Norway of all places. I have never in my life tasted such a vile, disgusting liquor. One shot was enough to convince me that if I poured half of the bottle into my cars' gas tank, that my I would make it to the moon and back. Easy. F*cking terrible. Britts was langers but totally coherent and funny as hell. Stanners is one top fellow as well. Such a laugh those two together. The next morning was good until I had a "Full English" at some place called the Indi bar. It was sh*te. All the breakfast did was make me feel drunk again. Finally we all parted ways with Britton and Stanley who had come out with us. Those were the last remnants of one of the best times in my life, and without trying to sound dramatic, Post CPO Depression kicked in. Walking through the hotel and not seeing any Chelsea you recognize makes you feel empty after an event like that! I felt it after the Piss Up knowing everyone was gone, during Porto when I was alone at the Morrisons pub watching it, after the CPO and now after the whole trip. In addition to so many memories and friends made, all this night/trip did was make me fall in love with Chelsea even more (which I have now given up thinking is impossible) and has made me set aside a handful of bucks symbolizing the start of my savings for next years trip. A couple photos, as Beth has a few more, and to be honest I didn't take that many. Too busy chatting it up and drinking. The Four Captains On Stage Minto, Campos, Walker Ian Bloody Britton, Gary Ladies Man Stanley, Yank

Wicked photos. Loz, Liams brudda was taking the photos with my camera. Turns out either he was pressing the wrong button or something because only one came out. I didn't snap any of our round table either. Valerie promised she'd do a dance for everyone on the table so I was saving my camera space for that. Never bloody happened.

The first of two videos. I'm still trying to figure out how to get the best quality in an upload, so it isn't the best but hey...you can hear liam's message so that's all that really matters. This was later on in the evening. We were langers. Valerie will make an appearance in the next video so calm down everyone. 800 Years...

Here I am then, just a walk away from the Wood Green tube station at a friends house who has very generously let me use it until she and nearly all my London contacts return from our match in Porto. I am feeling a bit queasy due to being closer to sh*te Hart Lane then I should ever be...unless Chelsea are involved, but apart from that I am doing just fine. The recovery from the piss up is complete. And to think I only made the last half of it. This was my first trip to London and of course the first match I've seen the boys play at HQ, so I could go on and on about my arrival and my experiences but I will keep this Shed End related. I teksted Valerie a little after 8am to let her know that Lloyd's brekkers was sooo on, and that wicked Loz was on his way. 10am was the start time that I was fighting for and I made that clear to the both of them, not to mention my other mates who were in the area. Of course it would turn out that Beth and I show up 15 minutes late, torturing poor Val and loz who were there right on the nose and sitting proper cross legged on the carpet with hands crossed and books open waiting for class to start. I apologize to the both of you again. Great way to make a first impression! Though I blame it all on Beth. She knows more people at the Bridge than Quaresma does. Bad example. Maybe more like Glen Johnson. Anyways, she knows a sh*t load of people, and it was a walk-stop-walk-stop on the way to Lloyds. So we finally arrive and introduce ourselves and put a couple tables together to make it one big group. A couple of things to point out. Breakfast was huge and cheap. Loz hates baseball. Val tried to grab Loz' and my attention by intentionally spilling HP sauce on her top. Of course it worked. The two seasoned Shed Enders then set off to the Mitre for the pre match piss up. I couldn't make the pre match since it was my first match, and because of the friends I've made over the past USA tours, I had to try to be everywhere at once. Yes, there were a few people who wanted a piece of Celery at the same time, but what is usually so easy on the summer tours is difficult to make happen over here. Everyone has their pub or routine that they go through on match day. So I found myself going from The 8 Bells at Putney back to Morrisons just down from the So Bar, to the So Bar, to a pub who's name I forgot, finally to the Bridge. On the tours, everyone is all in one place! I prefer that! Like I said I could go on for days about my matchday experience. That feeling walking toward the Bridge and finally soaking everything in, is one that I will never forget. Fast forward...I was Shed Lower and the atmosphere was actually better than I expected. Rather, the steward presence was less of a problem than I had expected. Apart from the first 10 minutes of the second half, the middle and part of our west section stood for just about the whole time. I was so pleased with that, as it made the bouncy easier, helped me ask the shoeless away support if they were indeed T*tt*nh*m in disguise, and generally made the experience better. Goal, goal, goal and then another goal. Three of which were put away right in front of me. A+ on the day so far. Beautiful. Made my way out of the Bridge noticing the Arse lose on the tv, and belting out one last Carefree with everyone. Parted ways with Beth who was on her way back to Putney, and walked to the Mitre. Got confirmation from Val on the phone that they were all in the back and headed inside. I met the circle of blue hell and put faces to board names. I love doing that. Liam totally looks like a Liam. Plokoon fits, as did ethicalstrategy for some reason. I sometimes wonder if I look like a Blue Celery. People say I look like a douchebag, and sometimes Kevin Bacon, but I've never used either of those as board names. So we drank and talked and had fun. All this without having to log in! Few things to remember from the night: - Geezer is awesome. - Valerie isn't attracted to Cudicini at all, and if she is, it definitely has nothing to do with his looks or anything sexual. - Val thought my Celery pin symbolized something. Quite insulting as the pin is barely an inch long. - Loz is indeed as Geezer put it, a legend. - Liam made the biggest impression on me even though we didn't get to talk much. His thoughts on 600 hundred years of oppression sunk in so much that whenever we meet again, I will follow him and back him up in anything he does. Rob a bank? I'm there. Tie ethical's shoelaces together? Done. Steal plokoons West Wing DVD collection and sell it to G4 for whatever he wants to pay for them? Boom. - Liams brother is a good guy. - Even though I'm a complete shed end boot boy, I'll say that Bluebeard was there in spirit. - Mad_mac too - Taking pictures with my CIA flag was great and I thank everyone for that. I do have just the one photo with the flag on my camera and it isn't the best, so you's folks is gonna have t' come t'rue with the ones yous took. I have two short but sweet video clips of the night on my flip camera, but alas they are in my bags that I left at the Shed Hotel for when I return back to the Bridge on Thursday. So when I get back there I will log on and get those posted. It's been a wonderful trip so far and the piss up was brilliant. This means that I will have to consider when the next piss up kicks off before I plan my next trip over. I've still got the CPO lunch and Arsenal away on sunday but I'm already thinking about next year. Thanks so much to everyone! You're a damn wonderful group!

Har dee har. There is indeed a choice my friend, and I know a few people who's main priority is seeing and supporting our country to glory. The awareness is growing, the appetite for the game is growing, and the loyal traveling fan is now actually a reality. My choice of course is Chelsea, but that doesn't mean I sneeze at the US. It's my country. I'll be cheering them on to another unpredictable World Cup run.

Yeovil Town Delia Smith Coors Light Texas Hold'em

Will we be shopping for naming rights to the center circle? The corner flags? I'm hearing that Norwich are going down that road with their new "Delia Smith Six Yard Box," which sounds disgusting but might not be far from the truth.

Up until today I don't think he realized it either.

My word...I've chosen Malouda. Joe was wonderful and would be my next choice, but Malouda was wonderful as well and also got a goal.

Barnsley's goal against Utd!!! Brilliant. Foster should be dropped from the England squad for not dealing with this well worked move. EDIT: This is a better version. You'll also hear the mancs singing "Fergie sign him on..." at the end. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znkp-4ciCDs

....That's why we love....

Agreed. I think it would be just as controversial for him to say he hopes Chelsea win.

Keepers without gloves. Cech without a helmet.

I do it all the time. But the difference is that my charm and stunning good looks are all the payment that a lady needs. The alcohol costs don't count. Yes, this will probably be ignored by the media but I think the problem is that it's ignored by the average football fan. They latch on to the negative stuff way more than any story like this.

Such a selfish pig bar steward that JT. Paying for ladies to entertain him. Shameful.

So you're saying Deco and Anelka would have tucked those chances away if we were using a different formation? Nothing wrong with the formation at the moment. Today was all about getting it done when it counted. Carvalho didn't, Deco didn't, Anelka didn't and on and on. The tune will change when we start racking up the wins again, and beat United.

Those are the best. Welcome Col.

It will be refreshing to have Browsingwa and Drogs back. I'm less worried about having that CM lump called EssiLampallack when we have both Ash and Jose bombing down the wings.

Check the sarcasm meter mate. We all know he blew that match. ;) And if Hiddink was smart to it, then that should give us a hint. Have a feeling we wouldn't be seeing him at all if Guus was still here.

He was good.

Fantastic. She obviously saw something in you and did what it took to find it. Now that's a lady.

Where is Italy again?

Although it wasn't his best match in his career, Cech was MOM hands down.