Hessleboink

Haha. He's an absolute tit. Near the end of the game he mentioned "big international friendlies" on the horizon for Mount, which got a tongue-in-cheek response of "San Marino". Being the tiny-cocked man-child that is he, he gave a grave "well, they're all big games when you're fighting for you place in the squad". No, mate -- Jesse Lingard is in the squad for a reason, please do us all favour and stop making sounds.

Good shout! J. Lindz goal now, plus a screamer from Xhaka and you're in the money!

Keown is such an insufferable twat. Most of the other annoying ones I can at least zone out to, but his voice has such an annoying quality to it, and he chats such extreme levels of sh*t that it's almost impossible to ignore. If you got cornered with the guy at a party you'd start drinking yourself into oblivion.

Really don't like Chillwell at wingback. Giroud seems a bit too slow for this system, too. Preferred forward line looks like Mount, Havertz, Werner at the moment. Maybe with Ziyech behind those 3.

There ya go guys haha! Gilmour is in!

Hadn't crossed my mind until I saw his name in one of the comments above. Now that it has, and the possibility us reaching the Champions League final in a long old while seems a realistic possibility, does anyone else wish Hazard could've gotten there with us, or with this team even? I think we all universally loved him, and i'd have liked to have seen him get the chance to have a big big final with us. Anyway, a bit of a deviation from the topic!

This is a fair comment. I haven't seen them play much. These games are often tight though, and having two world class finishers makes them favourites in my eyes.

Is the semi-final over two legs or just one this year? Tuchel said only 4 games left? Anyway, on current form I'd say we're favourites to reach the final, then would be big underdogs against any of City, PSG, Bayern? Will be interesting to see how we get on at the Etihad between now and then.

He goes down like a sack of sh*t, but I think given Azpi's behind him, and it's motivated by his own mistake, it looks like a deliberate attempt to impede, so we're lucky it didn't go to VAR. It's very funny though -- I hate these diving c**ts. I'd like to see some niggly fouls in Suarez go unpunished now.

I was just about to make a joke about Ziyech needing a stadium roof to get the best out of him, then he scored. Lovely stuff!

Agreed - he's been absolutely quality since Tuchel came in. Also willing to give him the benefit of the doubt on the Lampard situation, so very happy to have him in the team at the moment. One of the first names on the team sheet.

Hmm. Too sleepy to be nervous. Zouma is a worry, then again, he should be able to completely dominate Suarez physically. Hopefully Ziyech will be able to find a bit more space in this game and do some damage. Havertz to score. Think this could be a nervy 1-1! C'mon Chels!

He was excellent. Looks like he might be the most natural finisher out of all of our attackers, too. I actually think he was exactly what we've been missing recently -- someone big in middle who can keep hold of the ball, but also has the pace to stretch the defence. When you see him play like that, is seems bizarre to try and play him as a number 8. He looks like a Striker -- one that's very, very good on the ball.

I like the look of that team. Mount needed a rest eventually, and I think this might be a game that suits Havertz. Everton are quite physical and not the quickest, right? I think we'll see him dropping deep as a false 9. With Odoi and Werner stretching the defence with pace, hopefully he finds the space he wasn't able to under Lampard (this isn't some veiled dig, I just mean a new tactical set up).

Suarez is the only player in the world that can be elbowed in the teeth several yard outside of the box and win a penalty.