Upsetter

As luck would have it, I've just been talking to a Scouser, but an Evertonian. Discussing yesterday's match, he said to me: "Yeah Liverpool, they get all the luck, don't they. We call them the Devil's Club." Say no more.

R.I.P.

You assume a lot. How do you know he's never been to a game? He actually writes elsewhere about what he used to wear to the Bridge. Whether he actually lived in or around London I couldn't say. What I can tell you is that back in the '70s and "80s we had fans who'd travel regularly to home and away games from as far afield as Carlisle, Sunderland and beyond. What do you know? Not a lot by the sound of it.

Ok I get what people are saying about expectations changing with the times. However, taking this season in isolation, we have a new, inexperienced manager, the transfer ban and an almost freakish injury list to contend with. Not to mention the reality of adjusting to life without Eden Hazard, then surely it's plain that expectations have to be lowered, if only for this season. Top four is never guaranteed, this season top six would be a bonus. But then who knows? As Frank gains experience, and with a full complement of players to choose from, our form could well pick up dramatically. In the meantime, my advice would be to keep those expectations realistic, expect a few glitches along the way, and above all continue to enjoy the roller coaster that has always gone hand in hand with being a Chelsea supporter.

If ever there was a one-off then this is it. Love this song!

A somewhat classier, more tuneful way of saying "no-one likes us, we don't care!"

Oh I'd rather see refs f**k up than have VAR I'd rather see refs f**k up than have VAR Rather see refs f**k up Rather see refs f**k up Rather see refs f**k up than have VAR VAR OUT We all hate VAR and VAR and VAR VAR and VAR and VAR and VAR And VAR and VAR and VAR We all f**king hate VAR VAR OUT VAR is atrocious Football ain't the same We're in agreement That VAR will wreck the game VAR OUT

Change of subject: the overall standard of refereeing last night, was very good,going on excellent, better i thought, than what we've become accustomed to in the Premier League. On a few occasions, the ref was conned by Liverpool players diving (e.g. Alexander Arnold in the penalty area, throwing himself over one of our forwards, clutching his face as if he'd been whacked with a baseball bat, "earning" a free kick and breaking up one of our more promising attacks), but I can't hold that against them. This is down to the gamesmanship/dishonesty/prevalence of cheating bastards that is all too common in the modern game. To misquote The Monks: "Nice legs shame about the... ...decisions to disallow both Pulisic and Mason Mount's "goals"... even if both decisions were (whisper it) probably correct. Ish. Sorry, couldn't resist it!

Well I think you're talking out of your arse. But hey ho, that's just my opinion.

Chopper Harris would be proud of the way Jorginho took out Barca's new Liverpool fan.

The badges are online now. I've just ordered mine.

Another oldie but goodie. Not as old as the last one though! Presidents Ford, Reagan, Carter, Nixon and Clinton were on the Titanic on that fateful night when the ship hit an iceberg and it began to sink. Ford screamed, "What should we do? Reagan said, "Man the lifeboats." Carter said, "Women first." Nixon said, "Screw the women." Clinton said, "Do you think we have time?" LAND OF THE FREE HOME OF THE BRAVE TEE SHIRT to

Looks like Jose v Benitez is a distinct possibility. From the Telegraph: Jose Mourinho in talks with China's richest man over taking charge of Guangzhou Evergrande . Jose Mourinho is in talks with the richest man in China, Hui Ka Yan, to take over at the Chinese Super League club Guangzhou Evergrande and possibly even the national team. Hui, who is the chairman of the Evergrande Group, one of China’s biggest property companies, has dedicated himself to building up the country’s super league and also helping gain qualification for the World Cup. The two men met over the Chinese new year with Hui determined to recruit the best in the world in an attempt to increase the standard and profile of Chinese football. Hiring a coach of the calibre and profile of Mourinho would be a huge statement of intent. Hui is well-known for his passion for football and has ploughed millions into developing the largest football school in the world in China in the hope that it will help the league and the national team. China have only qualified once for the World Cup, in 2002, but a development plan has been put forward with the aim of eventually making the country a “world football superpower”. Talks are believed to be ongoing with Mourinho tempted by the prospect of helping to develop the league but also the Chinese national team who are targeting World Cup qualification. Mourinho has spoken in the past about developing fledgling leagues and seeking a new challenge. Mourinho, 56, has not managed since being sacked by Manchester United earlier year and has been hoping to join a new club this summer. He was strongly linked with a return to Inter Milan before Antonio Conte was hired and had been hoping that Paris Saint-Germain might replace Thomas Tuchel who has, instead, been awarded a new contract. The Evergrande Group, which Hui founded in Guangzhou in 1996 bought the football club nine years ago and has invested heavily – winning the 2013 AFC Champions League under Italian coach Marcelo Lippi who now coaches the Chinese national team and won it again in 2015. It is regarded as the most valuable team in China and is currently coach by Italy’s World Cup winning defender Fabio Cannavaro with its squad including the former Tottenham Hotspur and Barcelona midfielder Paulinho.

A Morecambe and Wise classic, that was rarely, if ever, heard in full. There were two old men sat in deckchairs. One old man says to the other: "Its nice out isn't it." To which the second old man replies: "Yes it is, shall I get mine out too?"

Frank's farewell message to Derby County: "I would like to say a special thank you to Mel Morris, the players, staff and everyone who is associated with Derby County Football Club," “It has been a fantastic experience for me, and I feel privileged to have managed such a prestigious club. “Most of all, I want to thank the fans who supported me and the team from the day I arrived in the City. I wish everyone the best of luck going forward.” Absolute class.

Yup!

They're now saying that the delay is because Instagram is down. f**ks sakes!

TalkSport (yeah I know) saying that a three year deal has been agreed, and that an announcement is expected tonight after a few remaining minor details have been ironed out. They add that Frank wants to bring in Didier Drogba to complement his backgound staff, but that Shay Given is expected to remain at Derby. "We are awaiting the announcement"

In other words you can't name a single example. In other words, you haven't got a clue. You're here on a windup, I a pathetic attempt to impress your fellow Derby fans. In other words, you've long outstayed any welcome you were due, but you're damned if you're going to walk away. You're going to keep on and on and on in the blind hope that someone here snaps, and maybe even gets banned for ripping into you. Not going to happen sunshine. You simply ain't worth it.

Nosy f**ker that I am, I checked out your forum earlier this morning. And in amongst the mixture of outrage and support for Frank Lampard, there was a comment quoting an article (sorry I forget which paper) stating that it was the Derby County chairman who was mostly responsible for the delay. Which makes sense, added your fellow Derby supporter. So I would suggest that if you really want to argue the toss, do so back at dcfcfans.co.uk, because nobody here is remotely interested in your pitiful bleating

Meanwhile, the Independent are telling us that Chelsea expect to confirm Frank Lampard's appointment imminently. Which begs the question: how many imminentlys are there in 48 hours?

Meanwhile, the Independent are telling us that Chelsea expect to confirm Frank Lampard's appointment imminently. Which begs the question: how many imminentlys are there in 48 hours?

Looks like old Jim's been reading this thread. "Sky Sports sources (aka theshedend.com) understands..."