Liam

Sounds painful. Nice post Kenn. Pretty much agree with all of it.

We proved yet again that with the players we've got a high tempo is essential. Everytime we upped the tempo we looked dangerous. Everytime we tried a slow build-up we lost the ball. Ratings Cuducini - 7 - 1 great save, distribution good, doesn't dominate however A Cole - 8 - Best I've seen from this total tosser Terry - 8 - Brilliant, dominant performance, from this total legend Carvalho - 8 - MOM for me. Plays the game on his a rse better than any centre half I've ever seen Essien - 6 - Doesn't really understand the full back position but still does well Makalele - 6 - Embodies all that is right and all that is wrong in our central midfielders Ballack - 6 - Snatch! Lampard - 7 - Most of the time he missed his passes but he has a presence on the pitch J Cole - 7 - Fantastic free spirit on the pitch, better than anything the A rse have to offer Drogba - 8 - At times infuriating but ultimately the match winner. Made a fool of G****s Anelka - 7 - Looked good in tandem with Drogba. Great hopes for the future Grant - 8 - Took the pressure off the players brilliantly by sitting there watching the game

I agree it's a must win but I don't epect it to be easy. They have a few players who can cause problems. Murphy is improving all the time and Drogbalite has the odd good day. In defence Evans and Bardsley are premiership standard and the goalkeeper is decent. They are also have a good home record. It's in the centre of midfield they have nothing. We should dominate here which if we take a chance or two should be enough.

Over 4 goals a game conceded. It's lucky you had a good forward line.

I made a post on this topic at about 3.23 pm today which seems to have disappeared. Weird. Anyhow what I said was that ever since

We've never let the facts get in the way of a good conspiracy theory.

I think we have your point.

Do any players read the forum? God, I hope not.

You feel the way you do because you formed an erotic attachment to Mourinho. Even your avatar is testament to that.

Professional footballers "play for the coach".

I make it 3-0 to Just. 2 clinical strikes and 1 horrendous own goal.

Winner alright, winner alright.

The Champions League draw is fixed/UEFA hate Chelsea Despite all evidence to the contrary, and not one shred of evidence in support, this hoary old chestnut makes its appearance every season.

Be sure and pop back after the draw is made.

What are the great football myths? Here are two to start you off. Johnny Foreigner doesn't like it up and at 'im: Given that one of the great exponents of "up and at 'im" style football was Allardyce's Bolton, a team composed almost entirely by dodgy foreign types, I think we can lay that one to rest. There's is always one team sucked in to the relegation battle: This happened once, in 1976 probably, but the phrase is obligatory now in any discussion of the relegation battle. Any more?

What's this? I've just seen it. No way you're leaving Steve. I won't allow it. Start posting again you daft bugger.

He's finally found a stage as big as his backside.

Have a great day Mummy!

Conor Clifford

As ever with our team of athletes the key to a good performance is starting with, and maintaining, a high tempo. And we did that perfectly. Nice, comfortable, win. Ratings Cudicini - 8 - Made his save and distributed the ball well. Gets an extra point for his good looks Ferreira - 7 - Has there ever been a duller footballer? Bores me to tears. Completely unremarkable in everything he does Terry - 7 - Centre halves marauding forward are always good for a laugh. Dominant as ever Carvalho - 6 Cole - 5 - Didn't do much of anything. Loses a point for not being Bridge Makalele - 8 - MOM. Brilliant going forward. Always looked a goal threat. Needs to work on his defensive positioning if he wants to play in that holding role long term Lampard - 8 - Can you believe he doesn't make Bluebeard's best 11? Ballack - 8 - Proper footballer Cole - 6 - Got on the ball a fair bit in the early stages and did OK. Loses a point for not being Steve Sidwell Drogba - 5 - Has come back from Africa believing he's an artist rather than the supreme athlete he is. Incredibly flicky sh ite Mourinho - 10 - Thanks Jose for all that steam Grant - 7 - Work the camera, man. Work it. It's not enough to be doing a good job you have to let everyone see you doing it

Let's forget the FA have rescinded the card as quickly as we can.

Anyone could win this competition. The will to win that Jose infused in the team should be enough to see us through.

Anyone could win that trophy.

I'll second that. Top man!

Well said Moos. Proof that if you write enough eventually you'll get something right.