Topic Credit to @Van Butsen

 

Hardest decision I've ever made in my life, I'll go with Emile Heskey. 

I don't know, that's a tough one. Is granny spry?

Mick Harford

Shergar. 

I'm quite surprised to see at least 4 people think Emile Heskey is better up front than Peppa Pig!

Throw Kerry Dixon a shirt......

Ali Dia

I would much rather bring King Didier Drogba for the third time around than to have that big horse with a ponytail galloping around in a Chelsea shirt with all the rival fans having a laugh at us.

My ever so good self. 

At 61 years of age, arthritic and asthmatic with a dodgy knee, I'd be every bit as capable of laying on a treatment table, or even sitting on the substitute's bench as would Wor Andy.

Besides which, I haven't got a daft ponytail or a Geordie accent.

Come on Chelsea, what are you waiting for!

Giroud, robert Fleck or Cascarino still got their boots? :P

Edited January 17, 20188 yr by RickUK

I know this is a bit of a joke thread but what's Mario Gomez up to? I think he is similar in age to Llorente who we were wanting apparently and both are similar players 

Antonio Cassano

3 minutes ago, zolawannabe25 said:

I know this is a bit of a joke thread but what's Mario Gomez up to? I think he is similar in age to Llorente who we were wanting apparently and both are similar players 

I'd sign him just for this song

31 minutes ago, zolawannabe25 said:

I know this is a bit of a joke thread but what's Mario Gomez up to? I think he is similar in age to Llorente who we were wanting apparently and both are similar players 

He just this month signed for Stuttgart. He started his career there so it may be unlikely he'd be willing to move again?

Back on topic, Henk Veerman or Paul Onuachu.

Edited January 17, 20188 yr by the special one

Jozy Altidore.

1 hour ago, Upsetter said:

My ever so good self. 

At 61 years of age, arthritic and asthmatic with a dodgy knee, I'd be every bit as capable of laying on a treatment table, or even sitting on the substitute's bench as would Wor Andy.

Besides which, I haven't got a daft ponytail or a Geordie accent.

Come on Chelsea, what are you waiting for!

I think I might be suffering from schizophrenia or multiple personality disorder and might be posting as more than one of those personalities.  I'm that age, have all of those things wrong and am as capable.

I also don't have the ponytail or accent AND, and here is the clincher, I have that exact single in the profile pic on my jukebox!  (Younger viewers might want to ask an adult what that is)

Charlie Austin would be my alternative.

I despise the idea of signing that useless lump Carroll

Callum Wilson
Giroud
Charlie Austin
Paco Alcacer 
Jovetic
Luciano Vietto

 

Yoda

Alexis Sanchez's dogs

Judge Rinder

Honey Monster

Robert Mugabe

Pepa Pig so over rated, would take noddy all day long, proper old skool striker.

I know this is a bit of a joke thread but what's Mario Gomez up to? I think he is similar in age to Llorente who we were wanting apparently and both are similar players 

Would actually be a great signing

Not Peter Crouch.